Just loving 'it'!

During the time when being single is deemed as the best way to be happy in life...with no responsibilities, no burdens, no liabilities and no ifs and buts.....a complete freedom....!!!

‘Living in’ if felt love and living out when did not click!..Wow... a pleasure of choosing and free from taking much mammoth decisions in life.

Some of my friends who chose to be single always wanted to know how do long married couples make their relationship work...How difficult or easy task is this... How am I managing with one man for this long??!!!.Though myself just few years married and committed, I wanted to pause and think over, what is known as old school of thought was actually worth all adjustments, settlements & pain by any of the partner...Is it getting married and spending rest of the life with one person only out of love or just living for the heck of it!!.

But recently I came across a letter...or say a love letter by a wife to her husband...I think here is a reply of their and many others question to some extent....and the reply of the husband which was received after 5 months!!!!.......

Hi H
I just wanted to write this to u. I don’t know why but yes I felt a kind of aloofness from your side since past few days. As if you are deliberately trying to get away things from your mind. As if you are disturbed or angry because of something. I don’t know the reason. Though it happened earlier too. There was silence, then long discussions, silence again and finally the happy ending we try and do forgive and forget past thing for each other. We respect each others feelings but sometimes unknowingly may hurt too each other again, afterall we all r humans on earth. or you may not like me for certain things or vice versa.
But the most important part being, we want to finally end the matter and live again happily. Is this the beauty of our marital relationship or just love? I don’t know but the day we settle down happily after a fight is the happiest day of my life.

I agree that priorities change - jobs, kids, responsibilities ...!! Etc etc. May be initially it was very easier to show each other how much we loved each other. Now it's the smaller day-to-day things that do it for us. The smiles, jokes, a touch, a gesture, sharing problems, pains or even a comment…positive or negative but openly discussed with each other….
Earlier it was just love, now with maturity and few years together, it's a combination of love and companionship. There is certain kind of trust that builds over the years, a deep rooted understanding of even so much as a change in facial expression. May be more years to make it perfect. Whatever the words I express, but H. I love you very much same as on the day we first met, first looked into each others eyes… nothing seems good in life if you are not happy. All sharing, caring after disagreements is worth because it makes us feel our presence is necessary in each others lives.
You may find odd reading this mail and I found it hard to write it but somehow I had to tell you how much you mean to me.
LU
urs
W.

-------------After 5 months...

Hi W.,

(Copy paste of the old letter) Taking you through memory lane...Itna mat socha karo

hahahaha...I will always b urs no matter how much we fight!!:)

ILU

Only
Urs
H.

'Unexpected thy name...

Writing is always an issue. What to write especially when the whole world is open to see your skills or better say your flaws in thoughts.

But let me begin with 'unexpected'. Like this one when I created a blog which I never wanted to. Reason..not so sure...hiding from the world?.....eh! Or 'unexpected' this one when i planned a long ride in my new car with my father-in-law for the coming weekend and suddenly after few hours he departs for another journey leaving behind grieving souls in just 'shock'! Or this one when we all were joyful over news of new life in the family after 6 long years just to know later it is no more in this world. A miscarriage! And more 'unexpected' to follow...better not to narrate past wounds.

The 'unexpected' is thy name ...O life. This is the lesson 'life' these days is teaching me. And I am grateful even for all this as I never realized before what worst could happen when best is going on.

Still I am among the fortunate ones. This deeply felt when I visited an orphanage on my son's 2nd birthday. It had all physically or mentally disabled children whose parents or family left them never to return! And here they were left to the mercy of few in this closed world of orphanage.

Grown-ups in body but mind still of a child. Helpless, dependent, handicapped but still smiling with big 'Thankyou' as I gave each some fruits to eat. But they now wanted someone to tell how to eat the bananas or help them bite the apple!

I tried to help few. But in the process my hands were shaking. I looked at my just turned 2yr old son Zain who was standing at one corner of the hall and gazing at the mentally retarded boy of about 18 yr old who was trying to shake hands with him. Father of Church told me his name is Michael and is friendly with visitors and especially fond of kids. I moved towards them and asked my son to say 'hello' but he was not so keen at this friendship i guessed. But Michael was not leaving any stone unturned to speak to Zain. To an extent he succeeded but only for Zain to say 'bye bye' very excitedly directed at Michael only. I kissed Zain for his new friendship.

We came back. Bleary eyes but stronger hearts. I swear I felt among the blessed ones. Before going I had some complaints of sudden losses, unwanted experiences and complaints of some lacking materialism but now none.
Suddenly I realized I am rich! I have a healthy, lively little son whose one smile makes my whole day, loving hubby, a family and friends who really care for each other. And I have blessings of my parents and yes, blessings of sudden lost father-in-law with whom I shared a special bond of daughter-in-law. Miss u Bhaiji!

My first...

From scribbling in diaries to blogging...from schooldays to corporate lunches...yeah..a long way indeed.